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The Essential Group

Leadership Development, Executive Coaching, Transformational Experiences

How to Form Powerful & Effective Requests (vs. Complaints)

May 26, 2017 by site-administrator

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If well-formed, requests have the power to influence others, bring about more alignment, and compel action in service of a desired result, even when you don’t have authority in the organizational sense. Here are some tips on forming powerful and effective requests that will help you do just that:

    Requests - Yellow Ring Binder on Office Desktop with Office Supplies and Modern Laptop. Requests Business Concept on Blurred Background. Requests - Toned Illustration. 3D Render.

  • Clarity. Get clear about what you want. Have a specific goal in mind before you make a request.
  • Direction. Request a positive action, as opposed to a negative action; do so by using action language (i.e., rather than telling someone what you don’t want them to do, tell them what you do want them to do.)
  • Precision. Make precise asks that involve concrete actions.
  • Reasonableness. Request, don’t demand. This means that the person receiving your request is able to say “no” and life will go on.
  • Language. Use request language (e.g., “it would help me if ___” or “could you ___ so that ___”); avoid complaint language (e.g., “why___,” “don’t ___,” “you [or someone else] should ___”)

Once you’ve made your request, it’s a good idea to get a clear commitment from the other person that they will perform your request. Without it, you can’t be sure your request has landed.

Pro tip: make sure your requests are do-able. Good requests tend to be future-focused and specific (i.e., actionable), whereas complaints are typically focused on the past and more general. Watch out for areas where you think you are making a request but where it isn’t actually possible to perform what you’re talking about because everything is in the past or too many details are missing.


 

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